DAMN...That Kid's Funny!

I started this blog as a lighter-hearted counterpart to http://bridawgblog.blogspot.com/, and to keep a record of the funny, cute, and just plain strange things that go on the lives of a "damn near 30"-year-old and his family. Hope you enjoy it.

So my son, Chris, recently turned two, and I thought it would be a good time to start blogging about the hilarious things that he says and does these days. I'll also probably post updates from time to time about my wife's current pregnancy. We're due to have out second (and probably final) son in April, and it's a constant wonder to me how you ladies handle it...but that's another blog.

One of Chris's least favorite things these days is bathing. I'm not sure what exactly happened with that; he used to LOVE bath time when he was littler, but something has really set him off these days. Regardless, since we don't want to have the smelly kid in class we tend to bathe him from time to time. Last night he decided that he would only take a bath if could "take a shower with daddy." If you think this is anything other than cute, you're either NOT a parent or some kind of sicko (see http://dailydoseofdave.net/for a shining example). Anyway, I'm rummaging through the closet looking for a towel when I hear from around the corner, "I peed on the floor!" Not exactly what I was looking forward to hearing, but it's a pretty simple matter to clean up a little munchkin wiz. When I came back around the corner, though, I was confronted with something entirely different. Chris had what can only be described as a "Turd McNugget" sitting behind him on the bath mat. He pointed to it sadly and said, "I dropped that, Daddy." It's amazing to me that, in the two minutes he was out of his diaper and waiting to get into the shower, that he took care of business not once, but TWICE. I swear to God, the kid's got a sensor on him or something that lets him know it's time to pee ONLY when he's naked!

I'm hoping that the random sprinkler action will stop just in time for Matthew's (our second son's) arrival, but that thought is tempered by the knowledge of what' coming with #2. If you've ever had a baby boy in your house you can attest to this...the SECOND air hits a naked newborn boy he WILL pee on you! Your only hope for safety is to go in with a shield. Whether it's a piece of gauze (for the circumcised among us), a paper towel, a shovel or whatever, coverage is absolutely necessary when changing a newborn. Proceed with caution!